Claire in her own words:   “I have always been a highly motivated person, but when I was younger, I was highly motivated to self destruct!    Over the last ten years, I have learnt how to use my drive, ambition and general craziness for a better purpose. I completed my first marathon, Ironman and then Double Ironman… Many more ultra triathlons followed and also, Brutal Events was born.   I will be honest and admit I have struggled with addiction (and the depression and self-esteem issues that come with it), but almost eight years ago, I finally turned my life around and have not looked back since.  Of all my achievements, this is what I am most proud of, but it’s the one I don’t speak about. Well, until now…   I often get asked why I do the ultra endurance stuff, and I guess I love the fact that you can do anything if you train well and really want it.    In other news, I am a mum of two children (that aren’t kids anymore), a graphic/website designer, a writer, and I also run Brutal Events – brutalevents.co.uk (https://www.brutalevents.co.uk/) ”  

    • Content Warning – I’ve marked the episode as explicit as we do talk about weight and disordered eating. We don’t go into specifics but it is mentioned. 
      New episodes of the Tough Girl Podcast go live every Tuesday at 7am UK time – Hit the subscribe button so you don’t miss out.    Support the mission to increase the amount of female role models in the media. Visit www.patreon.com/toughgirlpodcast (http://www.patreon.com/toughgirlpodcast)  and subscribe – super quick and easy to do and it makes a massive difference. Thank you.   Show Notes

    • Who Claire is in her own words

    • Setting up her business Brutal Events (https://www.brutalevents.co.uk/)

    • Writing and publishing books

    • Moving back to Bournemouth from Hereford

    • Getting a bit more rebellious

    • Doing her own thing at school

    • Starting to run at 20

    • Challenges she faced as a single parent

    • Completing her first half marathon

    • Meeting her husband

    • Having no idea what Ironman is but wanting to participate

    • Not having a bike and being unable to swim

    • Splitting up with her husband

    • Getting a tattoo

    • Keeping friends with her ex-husband

    • Completing the Double Ironman

    • How important is it for her to complete the Ironman

    • Her Double Ironman finishing experience

    • Not working with coaches

    • How she balances training with two kids

    • Managing the pain from her ongoing injuries

    • Having Hyperlordosis

    • Focusing on her routines and plans

    • Things that help her manage her pain

    • Feeling like giving up

    • How and why did she keep going

    • Training for the Arch to Arc Triathlon (https://www.brutalclaire.co.uk/arch-to-arc)

    • How she feels about the challenge

    • Being on the right track after 13 years

    • Struggling with panic attacks

    • Managing her stress and anxiety

    • What causes her panic attacks in the water and swimming through it

    • How much does it cost her to do this challenge

    • A big bag of crisps and Netflix

    • Being addicted to sugar

    • Having to eat more than she wants to gain weight

    • Needing to step away from junk food and eat better food

    • Struggling with an eating disorder and monitoring herself against it

    • Writing her book, Becoming Brutal (https://brutalbranded.com/collections/brutal-books/products/becoming-brutal-book)

    • Getting into more detail about Brutal Events

    • Doing the Snowdonia marathon (http://www.snowdoniamarathon.co.uk/)

    • Where does “brutal” come from

    • Final words of advice
    Social Media   Website: www.brutalclaire.co.uk (https://www.brutalclaire.co.uk/)     Instagram: @brutalclaire (https://www.instagram.com/brutalclaire/)     Facebook: @brutalclaire (https://www.facebook.com/brutalclaire)   Book: Becoming Brutal (https://brutalbranded.com/collections/brutal-books/products/becoming-brutal-book)    

    Hello and welcome to the three-time award-winning tough girl podcast which is all about motivating and inspiring you while increasing amount of female role models in the media I’m your host Sarah Williams you can support the mission to increase amount of female role models in the media by visiting patreon p a

    N.com tgirl podcast I to take a moment to say a massive thank you to Linda Blakeley Katherine Harrison Anna galbrath Lisa McCoy Shauna Fallon CLA Davis Charlene Gibson Amy Burton Dave Davis and Patty Culp a massive thank you for all of your support new episodes of the tough girl podcast go live every

    Tuesday at 7:00 a.m. UK time so make sure you hit that subscribe button so you don’t miss out today I’m delighted to be speaking to CLA Smith who you may know as brutal CLA she’s an ultra endurance athlete and the only person in the UK to have finished a continuous

    Double decker which is 20 Iron Man in a row and she’s now trading for the arch to Arc Triathlon which she plans to take on in September 2022 just as a Content warning I’ve marked the episode as explicit as we do talk about weight and disordered eating we don’t go into

    Specifics but it is mentioned so I just wanted to flag that up to you just so you can make an informed Choice whether or not to listen to the episode or not what I would suggest you do is is if you’re not sure get a friend to listen

    To the episode first and then they can tell you whether or not it’s going to be suitable as I say we don’t talk about it in any great detail but it is mentioned now let’s speak with CLA Enjoy I’m class Smith um and I’m kind of known as brutal CLA I’m an event organizer and I’m also an ultra endurance athlete I started in Triathlon in 2007 and I completed my first Iron Man in 2008 which is so long ago and then it all

    Kind of got a little bit out of hand and I started doing crazy double um double ironmen and quins and Deckers and all sorts of crazy stuff I set my business brutal events up in 2011 mainly because I wanted to see uh like Ultra trions but over kind of arduous terrains if you

    Like so I set one up in snowdonia which was very hard work but you know awesome um and we also hold other sort of ultra events um and I’m also a graphic designer and website designer and I recently started writing and I published self-published two books last year and

    I’m currently writing another one somehow trying to squeeze that one in and I’ve got two children as well which are they’re 20 and 25 now so they’re huge and grown up so yeah that’s me I love it when you just sort of drop like you know like the double deckers and the

    Quins and I was thinking I don’t even know what these are so I can’t even wait to get on I mean I think people know about you know the Iron Man but when you said things got out of hand I think that’s going to be really really

    Fascinating but what were you like as a child were you always quite extreme no I was pretty quiet for a while I mean I grew up um I mean I’m sort of from Bournemouth U we moved for a while down to Herford where I was very happy we had

    A we were living in a little village and we had the sort of run of the fields behind which I really enoyed enjoyed and then my parents split up and I moved back to Bournemouth and I I was about eight or nine then and I remember just

    Being really fed off about this and like really cross and so I mean I was sort of kind of quiet up until that stage and I started getting a bit more rebellious and getting into trouble and time I got to secondary school I was fairly well known for being not a horrible

    Troublemaker but I just sort of kind of did my own thing I didn’t like school I only liked drawing which is the only thing I’m good at so I just did my own thing I guess did you enjoy like was that like a release for you or running

    Or anything I hated Sport with a passion I was awful at it I’m mathmatics I use that as my go-to excuse for anything yeah I hated it he said you did your first triathon in 2007 what was your why what was the journey to doing your first

    Triathlon well I mean I started running when my daughter was born and I was about 20 then and I was a single parent things had gotten a bit rough um things were you know tricky and I remember just sort taking her out in the she was a

    Great baby she slept a lot and she I put her in the push chair early morning when the postman was still around and I just run around the streets and I started getting sort of the endorphin rush from that and and just I just kind of recognized that that was a good positive

    Thing to be doing at that time in my life and I did complete my first half marathon around that time but then kind of things got in the way and you know life was tricky then so I didn’t really do much and I was quite unhealthy as

    Well and then yeah my life sort of settled down a bit I met another um like my my husband and you know life sort of got a bit more healthy I guess but I was still there was a side of me I guess looking for that kind of extremeness

    That I needed and I was running still at that point and I remember over hearing um a chat at my running club who was super fit saying about his training for he was training for an Iron Man he was saying to his friend oh God it’s killing

    Me it’s really hard and I was like I don’t know what is but whatever it is that’s that’s what I want to do that’s my next challenge thinking it was almost like a tough M I had visions of like running through fire and the whole barb

    Wire thing and when I got back and sort Googled Iron Man I was horrified to find out it was an actual Triathlon CU I couldn’t swim and I hadn’t got a bike and I mean the Running part I was like but but then I found out Iron Man was

    Not only a tri but a really long and hard dlon but me being me at that point I was like okay I’ve kind of committed to this thing that’s where it sort of all started really what do you remember from your first Iron Man are there sort of you obviously finishing it incredible

    Achievement but are there moments that you still sort of look back on and think holy heck how did I get through that like how did I finish it yeah well I mean I was actually at that point of um me and my husband were splitting up just

    Before the IR man we split up so it was an awful traumatic time and um I remember just standing in transition and before the event I’d got um a tattoo on my wrist and it’s like an African symbol for endurance because I knew that I

    Would get to the point where I was at that moment standing in transition with so many other people and all the mist and the cold and I knew that I would want to run away and I did I really did and I actually was looking at my bike

    Thinking I could just come back for this later it’s not that far from home I’ll just I’ll just go I’ll run and I remember looking down at my wrist and thinking oh God you know i’ got this tattoo and it’s like I can’t I can’t run away now i’ literally got a

    Tattoo of Endurance on my wrist so it did what it was supposed to do slightly extreme some might say but that you know I was utterly terrified of getting into that water especially with thousands of other people as well that was particularly challenging that was probably my worst moment in that whole

    Event to be honest Yeah you mentioned you know you’re going through a really tough time separating from from your partner from your husband was the exercise was the I suppose the extremeness of setting these challenges was that your your meditation your therapy or were you seeing like you

    Know a therapist away what you how else were you you know managing to cope with this really traumatic and difficult time I wasn’t really I mean I was just all I knew is that a part of the reason why we’d split up was because I was I am

    Like I am I need extreme things in my life and I man was a part of it and the thought of because a lot of people saying to me just you don’t have to do the IR man this year what you’re going through is enough um my me and my

    Husband ex-husband you know we’ve stayed friends all the years it was very amicable it wasn’t as you know as terrible as some divorces can get but it was still obviously a really tough time with the kids and stuff but for me completing that Iron Man it was so

    Important to get that done because of you know wouldn’t see all you know the whole reason that we were splitting up as Iron Man but there was a lot to do with it and it would just seemed awful for me to not do it you know at the end

    Of all of that it must take over your life right just the the sheer volume of training involved must have been really quite intense and then you said after you completed your first arm in 2008 that’s when things got out of hand and it was the crazy stuff

    Began it did start and yeah I mean the next year I was then living with my children in another house I had a job um part-time job at apprentice and I remember seeing um entries for well I was aware that the double Iron Man was

    Being held in the UK and it was the first ever double IR man in Lichfield in Birmingham and entries filled up really quickly and and I missed that that opportunity I probably wasn’t even thinking when I looked at it but I was there at work one day obviously should

    Have been working but wasn’t and it came up that an entry had been made available for the double Iron Man and I just it was one of those moments where I mean I guess my whole life changed at that point um but you know I was just in a

    Kind of grubby printers you know working away as a graphic designer and I got my credit card out and I just was like right doing it and I entered it like straight away without even really thinking about it and that was like my first proper Ultra triathon that I did

    That I completed and how does it work is it a double swim double bike double run so just double the distance or is it Swim Bike Run Swim Bike Run yes so the one that I did was a continuous where you do all of the swim and then all of

    The bike and then all of the run I fa better at that sort of like format if you like the one a day um which I have completed um a Quinn in um which was five backtack irmen I struggle with I’m still trying to do the DECA version of

    That where you do 10 irmen back to back because of every day has a a natural cut off obviously and if you don’t reach that cut off one you you’re obviously dnf at that point but if you just run out of time where you you know your

    Sleep then gets down to sort of two three hours a night and it becomes unmanageable after a while you know you can get to that point on day N9 or 10 but if you get to that point on day five where you’re having to hour sleep it’s challenging my my drawer is just

    Open well I mean for me I suppose it’s you know you have you’ve got this dream you’ve got this ambition you’ve got this goal especially you know going after the double eye man where did you start like did you have mentors that you could

    Speak to were you a member of a tri Club did you work with a coach did you do your own training I mean obviously you did your own training but you know create your own training plan you know how did you get to to that place where you were physically mentally and

    Emotionally ready to take on this challenge um I’ve never been very good at working with coaches I like the idea of it and I know it works for a lot of people but for me I’m not very good at being told what to do and I’m also because I’m self-employed my life’s kind

    Of chaotic sometimes and you know at the time when I was doing a lot of my training I had two kids so it was like I have to fit things in so becoming you know being part of a um like a club or having a coach just I’d love to have

    Done it but I just never it never worked for me so I was very much on my own for all of it really um just you know do my own thing and train when I can and you know I tend to sort of plan my weeks out

    So I look and think okay I can do a long bike there I can you know get in the sea there I can you know and and now obviously it’s a bit easier for me my kids are older and you you know I don’t live with them anymore so I can do what

    I want I mean how was it fitting in the training with you know with the two kids I mean were you getting up at ridiculous o’clock in the morning to go to go running to go cycling did you have you know sort of either family support or

    Um like like the hour is involved I mean h how did you do it um a lot of people think that you’re training all the time I mean and I guess some people do but I mean I I was realistic about say you can only do so much if you’re training for a

    Double Iron Man there’s not much different in terms of volume for me for a Double Deca which is 20 Iron Man it’s it’s you can only do so much and actually you can damage yourself at some point if you overtrain so it’s just a case of you know your body needs to know

    What a long bike and or a backtack especially feels like so having a long day on the bike grabbing a few hours Kip getting up and getting back on the bike you know it’s good that you know you get that in the bag for sure but you know

    You don’t if you’re doing a 2,000 M bike ride you don’t want to be training doing a thousand miles in training in one block because it would you’d end up with so many injuries and things like that so yeah just you got to manage it but with

    The kids yeah I did used to get up very me I do get up very early I’m a morning person so I do a lot of training you know that way and and you know when they when they were younger and they go to their dad it would be right I’ve got 24

    Hours what can I do in that 24 hours that I can’t do when I’ve got the kids and then you’d have your you know the turbo which is fine because you can do that when they’re knocking about and you know all that sort of stuff it’s just

    Being smart with your time and clever with what you can achieve without having too much of an impact on them have you ever dealt with sort of quite Serious injury or how do you stop yourself from being like overtrained I’m constantly getting injuried I mean I’ve had mostly every

    Injury known to man I think with running and that sort of stuff and I also have a issue which causes me a great deal of pain on the bike and with my running now so it’s it’s just about managing the pain that you can get from it with

    Ongoing injuries you know sometimes you can train through stuff I mean a lot of tendonitis stuff that I have I tend to have quite a lot of the time and if I didn’t train because something’s hurting I’d never train at all so it’s sort of managing that aspect of it and knowing

    The difference between an injury that you should stop and rest for however long it takes and other injuries that are just niggles and you can sort of you know maybe swap it so concentrate on swimming that week or you know stop I mean running is my big one I’d run a lot

    More if I could but I can’t so I have to manage my I can’t you know do huge amounts of miles with the run because I definitely get injured with that very quickly during your first double Iron Man was there a point mentally where either you you switched off thinking or

    Do you take it up a gear do you Zone now mentally what’s what’s going on inside your head like when does it get tough for you do you ever get to that point where you’re like oh this is a bit difficult yeah so I mean again with my

    Back issue so I have like um hyperlordosis in my lower back so it basically it’s always about like when is it going to start hurting really badly because when you get to that point it’s like it’s it comes all about like pain control and pain management and stuff

    Like that so it’s quite a lot of my longdistance stuff has been about that to be honest and that’s kind of takes over your brain it’s nice when I’m not thinking about that because it means it’s not hurting too much so yeah do I

    Zone out I guess I do I mean you know when you’re doing crazy miles it’s just about finding some sort of pleasure so drift off into something you know another place where things you’re not on a bike for days you know sometimes if you’re loud you can listen to S audio

    Books and stuff like that or some music and stuff like that not on the bikes obviously so that’s that’s quite good just to zone out but a lot of the time I mean I have like routines like for the first double ey man I was on a I’ve done

    A plan I laminated it it was all colorcoded and I kind of pretty much stuck to it you know with the laps and how long they were going to take and what I plan to eat and things like that so I was kind of focused on that too you

    Mentioned you know pain control and Pain Management what are your practical tips what have what have you found that has worked really well for you to help manage your pain I mean with the the nerve pain that I get there’s nothing that really works being really honest

    When I did the Juggle last year was I think yeah last year it got to the point that every day I’d be like the last 10 miles would be very very painful very painful and I found that singing like just out loud randomly would kind of

    Help I don’t know it’s some sort of like it was just a weird thing was just and I only had like one line of I think it was a Madonna song in my head and I was just singing it over and over but it it was weirdly kind of working almost I guess

    Like deep breathing and labor and things like that that’s that was kind of helping randomly do you ever want to quit oh yeah all the time yeah I mean for example I’m doing open w swimming training at the moment um and last uh week before I did a 10hour SE swim and

    It was a big deal for me and it was tough and I thought the first four hours was not too bad but I wanted to give up for the the next six the whole six hours in my head I was like I want to stop I

    Want to get out I want to stop and that’s a long time to want to quit and I didn’t but it took quite a lot to keep me you know in that water I had to play some games on my you know my brain just

    To try and you know stop me from walking out of the sea you know I’d love to know more about those games because I can’t like six hours of almost that I want to quit I want to quit I want to quit like how did you flip it how did you reframe

    It like how did you not stop there was just a couple of things that I knew because I was like what what do you want to do with this 10 hours you know what you know it was a big deal it’s for for the English Channel training and it was

    A big deal but the guy who runs the event that I’m training for is a big inspiration to me and he was on the beach and you know he hadn’t said to me you have to do 10 hours it was like do what you can 10 hours is the goal but do

    What you can but I knew and he’s quite um he’s very blunt and I knew that if I got out he’d be like yeah well you know it’s not great is it CLA he wouldn’t mince his words he’d just telling me how it was and I really did want I guess to

    Impress him on a real basic level and there was also other guys from the training camp that I was at at that point doing the same thing as me and I knew that they were all going to do it there was another five people and I

    Really wanted to be part of that final kind of finisher photo you know with the sea behind us and with everyone happy and I just kept thinking of that finisher photo and yeah we got a good photo and I was really pleased and it just made me feel so great that I

    Managed to push to and the other thing I I was also thinking was time is just time and this is quite a big thing no matter where you are whether you’re sat at your computer or sat on the sofa or suffering on the bike or in the sea time

    Will just pass and it obviously it’s the same time although it feels a lot slower when you’re suffering I tell myself that a lot no matter where I am so you know you might as will be doing something good cuz completing that 10h hour was awesome and it it’s taken my confidence

    To the next level which I really needed you know and yeah I could have got out at 600 and gone home but that time still would have passed and I wouldn’t have achieved what I needed to well what are you training for at the moment um the

    Arch to Ark which is in my view the hardest triathon in the world it goes from London to DOA it’s like a 90 M run and then you swim the English Channel and then you cycle from Cal to Paris and it’s a solo Challenge and um I think

    There’s 46 people that have completed it over the last 15 20 years so yeah this year is my big my big opportunity to take that on when it when’s it happening uh 24th of September is my tide so with the channel you get um a window where

    You basically sit and wait for the weather to play nicely and yeah you have to be ready to go within 24 hours of your boat pilot saying right you know we can swim on Tuesday so then you have to work backwards and get ready for the run

    So you have to get yourself up to London and get ready to you know basically spend between s 16 and 18 20 hours running down to DOA small break and then yeah you’re in the sea at that point so a 90 mile run the channel 17 miles to

    The channel it’s actually as the crowly is 21 but you never 21 unfortunately I wish you did but you actually because of the tie changes every six hours you end up swimming almost like um like a w shape just because you’re pushed for 6 hours in one way and you’re pushed for 6

    Hours in the other the longer you’re in there the more shapes you more Wiggles you make yeah so you can end up swimming sort of 24 25 possibly more and what about the cycle ride like how yeah that’s 180 miles it’s apparently it’s quite hilly I’m like across I don’t care

    What it is I crawl on my hand and I’d roll Escape backwards just to though you know that’s it’s such a big thing to get across the Channel that I can’t really see beyond that so I am training a little bit on the turbo but it’s not my main concern

    Right now how are you feeling about this challenge at the moment utterly terrified you know this has been a really big thing so when I first did the double Iron Man back in 2009 that’s that year uh 2008 2009 was the year that I entered this race so you can see how

    Long it’s been going on I’ve never got to the start line there’s always things that have just happened to stop me from getting to that point mainly because I’m not a good enough swimmer and I know that and also financial reasons and just life has gotten in the way for the last

    12 years I’ve been obsessed with this race and this year is the first time that I’m now I say feeling confident that’s not the right word but I’m I’m on the right track I’m a lot closer than I’ve ever been before to being able to complete it but the the next seven

    Months are going to be really really hard and it’s like normally I have like a list of priorities like everyone and you know work seems to be you got your work and your kids sort of thing but I put my training for the arch trar is at

    The very top of my list for the next seven months because it has to be I can’t blag it I say this to people and they laugh at you can blag a double decker if you’re strong minded enough and you can BL quite a few things if you

    You know if you can Griz it out but you cannot I cannot black the English Channel and I know that I’m just in awe like you know the word you Ed was like terrified but this has been a dream that you’ve had since 2009 that’s a long time

    To hold on to this I know it’s huge it’s massive and it does I do wake up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat over it it’s a big thing it’s the biggest thing if I can achieve it it would be the biggest thing I’ve ever achieved for

    Me personally and for a lot of other people dead think the double DEA was but I guess it for me the swimming aspect is so difficult I struggle with the temperature I struggle with panic attacks a lot in this choppy water it’s not my happy place it really isn’t what are you doing

    To help sort of manage your nerves and anxiety you know it’s definitely something that I’ve experienced you know before Marathon disar I was like I even remember I had all I was in my bedroom and I had my bag out and I was like all my food and gear and Equipment laying

    Around around me and I was just looking at it all and I was just like oh you’re like literally getting overwhelmed and I was having to basically walk out of the room take some breath and come back and be like okay just put why don’t you just

    Put your food in piles okay put food in piles for each day and then walk out of the room again and then come back in but are you doing anything to to help manage the nerves the anxiety the sort of that stress I think it’s like what you said

    It’s just breaking it down if you look at the whole thing it’s terrifying um but it’s just like you know when I get overwhelmed I sort of you know sit down and just like what what am I doing that’s helping and you know for the Channel swim I’m putting on a bit of

    Weight on which isn’t particularly easy for me I’ve just started Masters Swimming which is just incredibly hard and you know there’s certain I’m weight train there C so I’m like what what can you do so even if you get to the end of it and you failed but things out of your

    Control at least you can’t turn around and think well at least if only I’d done this or if only I’d done that I’m kind of making sure that I’m doing everything think that I can to ensure that I at you know the best condition you know give myself the best opportunity to actually

    Do it and that kind of helps with my anxiety a bit when I get overwhelmed is just to do that have you ever spoken with a sports psychologist um I do speak to quite a few people about yeah like how to deal with nerves and things like

    That and especially with the sea a lot of people try and help me with you know my panic attacks and things which is really useful and they’ve given me advice on how to I mean I I do a lot of counting when I get overwhelmed and I’ve

    Done this during events as well when you just can’t you’re just in such a state and you’re just you know in a lot of pain and things like that I just sometimes I count to 100 over and over again um and it just sort of switches

    That other part of your brain that’s you know really not being helpful at that moment it switches it off so I use that as a and when I’m swimming if I’m having a panic attack sometimes again I’ll just count over and over again it’s a bit

    Mental but it seems to work for me do you know what causes your panic attacks in swimming like have you ever had sort of a bad experience in the water I look back and I think you know what is it I I mean I almost died in sinking sand when

    I was a kid but I don’t that’s not really water even though it was by the sea but I think it comes down to one memory that I have of my dad holding me in the sea and we were having a good time I was I was like seven or something

    And I remember his body just like freezing up and and feeling the fear because this massive wave was coming and I was oblivious to it because I was with my dad but he was scared and he and I think that’s where it must come from

    That my dad is just really scared of the water or big waves that’s the only thing I can think of I mean I haven’t had any really awful experiences other than having panic attacks which are pretty unpleasant you know while swimming you know it’s just just kind of got to get

    On with it I think there’s a lot of times where I’ve been in the water and had horrendous panic attacks and almost enough to stop you really wanting to ever go back in the water but the way I see it is you know sometimes I have a good swim you know

    And yeah I’ve just focus on that and these days I I kind of view my panic attacks in the water very much as like a wave so they kind of build to a peak and then they kind of you know go down in sort of terms of intensity and and I

    View it like that and somehow I just had to swim through the panic attacks which are it’s deeply unpleasant but at the same time it’s they do they pass you know how much is it costing you to do this race or this challenge really really lots of money I’ve sold my house

    So um it costs about seven grand for the entry I have not said that out loud yeah that’s it’s stupid money and then of course there’s the actual kind of race itself with you know hotels and Fuel and things like that and do that on a shoest string because there’s no money

    Left there’s nothing and it’s no there’s no sort of going back and doing this again really it’s you know it’s a in a lifetime opportunity I think a few people have tried to do it again but how that’s a lot of money to put on a race

    You know you sold you sorry you sold your house to pay for this I didn’t sell it but it was part of the reasons I had to like pay off some debts and that was one of them yeah so so where are you living at the moment I’m in Portland now

    Which is awesome really really you know because I’m I’m 2 minutes away from the the coast paath and I have a cvu so it’s it’s not it’s not a bad thing at all it’s just a completely different life I used to live in a a three bed semi in

    Christ Church in Dorset so it’s a yeah big change yeah are you good at rest and relaxation yeah I am quite good actually I everyone always assumes that I’m like doing I’m just this crazy ball of energy and I’m never sitting down relaxing but I I like Netflix I’m I’m fine with that

    Big bag of crisps and Netflix that’s [Laughter] fine like I’m like but are you sat on the couch or are you sat on a turbo trainer watching Netflix series couch I’m fine with that I can also watch yeah I mean I have done stupid turbos and watched binge watch stuff yeah without a

    Doubt I don’t I’m not one of these people I can’t just sit and do nothing I mean I love music I’ve always got music going on that’s for sure so yeah but no I can relax it’s not a problem what about your nutrition like you are you eating yourself out of house

    And home home with like just the sheer volume of calories you must need to maintain well your your weight and you know with the amount of training that you’re doing get the recovery in like are you doing anything specific or you know what what does your what does your

    Diet look like I’m my diet’s not great I mean I’m I I just I’ve never been very good at eating either enough or I just eat too much of the the wrong sort of stuff I’m a bit sugar addicted a lot sugar addicted but going forwards this

    Year I mean like I said I’ve decided to put on I’m going to try and put on a stone because one of the issues I have is is the cold really does get to me and I don’t want it to be a contributing factor to not completing the arra AR so

    I’ve decided to put on a stone you know it’s easy to say and you think a stone isn’t actually that you know hard but it kind of is because like you said I’m training quite a lot now so you know at the moment I’m like breakfast is like a

    Big bowl of like oats and blueberry and almond milk and I try and stick some nuts in there and stuff like that trying to have protein shakes a couple of those a day I forget them I have to put like the protein shake on the side to remind

    Me to do that I mean I’m just very good at just eating just enough and feeling quite happy with that but now I’m having to eat more than I want to to put on weight which is f and also just to eat better quality food and not be like oh I

    Really want a fish finger sandwich you know it’s like yeah you can have the fish finger sand but you’ve got to has something decent you know so it’s stepping away from the junk food and increasing the sort of the overall volume and you know eating better food

    That’s what I need to do I I was going to make my joke was going to be to be honest I found it pretty easy especially over Co putting on weight and everyone says that no it’s not like it’s impossible for me to put on weight it’s

    Just it’s I do I sort of struggle with it a bit and also just from being you know I’ve had eating disorders and stuff in the past and my go-to is just not especially when I’m stressed out it’s just not eat because that’s what my you

    Know I’ve proben my brain to do for such a long time so it’s in a way it’s it’s quite an interesting it’s another sort of side to this whole challenge that I’m sort of like monitoring myself is how I kind of go forward with going almost completely against the eating disordered

    Sign of my brain to the like you need to eat 3,000 calories a day so yeah it’s quite interesting how was writing your book becoming brutal overcoming fear pain failure and addiction to become one of the world’s toughest Ultra endurance athletes I didn’t write that by the way

    Um yeah I mean God it’s that was definitely an ongoing process I’ve mean I’ve known I’ve wanted to write a book for a long long time but so that book was just a sort of like there was this stuff in it that’s you know I wrote 10

    Years ago um so it was like combining all of those and it wasn’t until I did the double decer that I just thought do you know what actually this is this happen now I’ve really properly got to pull everything together and somehow kind of make it into a book and i’ only

    I’ only just pass my English GCSE as well because I was like said earlier I was not very good at school and I only managed to pass art and drama um gcss which yeah they’re not that’s not great and then so a few years ago I thought I’m really fancy just sort of

    Taking um I think I was trying to do some sort of college work and they wouldn’t let me because I didn’t have enough GCC so I thought I going to see if I can get my English and I got a high B which I was really quite happy with so

    It turns out you know I can actually write a bit so which was useful so I could actually you know start learning a bit more about things that you need to do when you’re writing a book um like sentence structure and grammar and things like that so I found it a really

    Interesting process um I learned loads but it was stressful really stressful and time consuming and expensive and scary as well the worst thing was when I kind of got it all out there finally got it on Amazon which in itself is was an endurance event and then I remember just

    Being like wandering around the shops doing something and thinking oh my god what have I done I’ve put my whole life in a book on Amazon what the hell have I done you know and just being like it only just occurred to me after like a

    Year of solid hard work you know what’s the feedback be have you had many people reach out to you yeah I’ve had loads actually and it’s been amazing um it’s yeah it’s s it’s been really positive a lot of people who because there’s certain chapters that I mean I

    Don’t really like to think about to be honest because it’s parts of my life that you know were very difficult and I’m kind of embarrassed about them and um you know it’s tough but you know because of those chapters you know quite a few people regularly I get regular

    Messages weekly saying you know I’m going through the same thing um whether it’s abusive relationship or the alcohol issues that I had it’s but and so as much as it was hard to write that down and to face up to it and to admit that I’ve done these things and

    Gone through these things the fact that other people can read it and go yeah she went through it it’s fine I’m going through it but I can you know there’s a sort of you know there’s the other side of it when you come out of everything and your life improves and you get

    Stronger that’s you know and it’s good to share that stuff with people 100% like it would be so inspiring for people to think actually yeah I get to the other side and actually maybe I can take on my you know Triathlon or an Iron Man or you know a double Iron

    Man I mean tell us about um a brutal event you mentioned it briefly this is something that you started in 2011 and just tell us more about the yeah how how it works what your involvement is how you come up with the races and the challenges um well like I said I just

    Wanted to after doing that double Iron Man in Lichfield which was was you know a great event but it was it was just in it was run from a gym we were in the gym car park and we were cycling on the roads it was laps it was not inspiring

    In terms of like you know surrounding views and things like that so I wanted to put a double Iron Man basically on somewhere which was incredibly hard with amazing views and stuff I did the snow Donia marathon and that’s where I got to know clamb Baris and I was just blown

    Away by the you know the views and just the mountains basically because you know although I’d lived in Herford the black mountains don’t it’s not quite the same as snowdonia and I was just I think from that moment onwards I was looking for an excuse to legitimately spend more time

    In North Wales and at the time I was you know single mom I had a few jobs bit of graphic design cleaning cleaning people’s houses you know working caring for elderly people and so it was hard but you know those few years originally setting up brutal um and the race and

    Having to go through all the procedures with the council and I had no idea what I was doing I had nothing I had no training I started working with another local events company which did help um and I got quite a lot out of that um but

    It it was just a huge learning curve for me from everything from learning how to write event management plans risk assessments setting up safe courses obviously my graphic design really helped in terms of the websites and creating all that sort of stuff which you know helped keep the cost down but I

    Mean I got myself in a lot of debt through setting up brutal just you know going up for a council meeting with the fuel and everything like that would cost and I I wasn’t earning a lot at that point so it was a very difficult time

    But it and you know in terms of learning everything and making constant mistakes and trying to you know not show the world I didn’t know what I was doing but it was hugely rewarding to see it gradually growing over the years and being recognized and and also just it

    Brings people together I’ve made so many friends through it really good friends and and I can see connections have been made just through people going to a brutal event and that’s so rewarding I think even a couple met there and got married and had a baby which I thought

    Was super cool where does the brutal come from you so you’re you’re known as like brutal CLA I mean when I started originally thinking about putting a double IR man on I I remember driving around uh I don’t remember where I was somewhere in Bournemouth and I was just

    Trying to think of a name for the event and brutal popped up in my head and that’s where that came from and then brutal CLA was one of my closest friends who um I didn’t know before the brutal he came and did the first ever double

    Iron Man and W it he’s called Matthew Dales he’s awesome and um he called me he gives all his friends nicknames and so I became brutal CLA at that point and I hadn’t done apart from a dou y man and a few other bits I hadn’t done a huge

    Amount at that point so I kind of I I kind of grown into the brutal CLA name a bit but I didn’t I didn’t like name myself brutal CLA because I often thought people think I’m walking around like brutal CLA it’s it’s a bit you know there’s a lot of pressure because brutal

    CLA is terrified of swimming in the sea you know it’s not very brutal is it hey you are still going out there and doing it and facing facing these fears and and dealing with the you know the panic attack that you’re having in the water you’re you know you’re doing everything

    You can to overcome that so I think that’s incredible and I think I don’t think it’s brutal but I think it’s seriously impressive yeah it’s yeah it’s just like I say sometimes when you’re crying on the side of the road your feet are bleeding you’re like people say

    Remember you’re brutal clown I’m like yeah yeah brutal I could do this I hope I hope you’ve got like a hoodie with brutal CLA on the back I actually haven’t you know should do that shouldn’t I get one done I was say you’ve got to have one

    For for your AR to Arc challenge 100% CLA how can people follow along with you how can they be kept up to date with your challenges be kept up to date with the challenges through brutal events and obviously if you know follow along with your future adventures and

    Challenges where are you most active on the socials um I guess I mean Instagram and Facebook I mean I’ve got yeah brutal CLA on Instagram and Facebook and then I’ve got a website brutal CLA .co.uk and that’s got links to everything on there as well Al my books and stuff um and

    Then brutal events is brutal events. co.uk and brutal events on Instagram so it’s pretty easy to find us and what we’re doing and all the adventures we’re having fantastic and cl I want to hand it over to you and you can take this in any direction you want final words of advice

    Final words of wisdom for other women out there who I don’t I’m trying to think of a good segue to like you know who want to be brutal but you know but he want to he want to really chish themselves and to actually deal with their own personal fears and things that

    Are holding them back what advice would you have for those women listening about how they can you know move forward and face these challenges I mean I think for me personally is I’m I’ve trained myself over the years to not be afraid to fail and I think a few people say this sort

    Of stuff but it’s it’s very true there’s a lot of people that say I could never do what you do and I’m like well you really could but you know one of the things I do is I always break everything down so a double deck is never a double

    Decker it’s it’s just chunked right down to like even like sometimes into like half an hour chunks so you’re never taking on that huge event you know you just got to always break it down and then it’s just at the end of the day you’ve got to think I could really stuff

    This up and yeah there’s that that always at risk that you could um but it’s like you can’t I mean I still mess up a whole bunch of Stu stuff you know but you’ve got to take that and take it on the chin and go do you know what I

    Tried um and I’m going to try again I’ve learned from this I’ve learned from that and made a list and I’m going to push on and and you know keep keep going forwards you know 100% 100% CLA thank you so much for coming on tough podcast and sharing more about your challenges

    Your passion for ulture endurance um your amazing challenges and just best of luck with u The Arc to AR it’s going to be incredible to follow follow along with you on that Journey just in like I’m in all just incredible stuff that you’re doing well thank you for having Me hey tribe how you doing I hope you enjoyed the episode with CLA what an absolute inspiration and what a challenge that she is taking on the arched Ark Triathlon just absolutely incredible and I got challenge fascinates you then I have got the perfect episode for you to listen to if

    You take a listen to Laura Marshall who came on the tough podcast on November 12 2019 so Laura Marshall became the first solo Australian woman to complete this Challenge and in doing so she broke the world record for the fastest woman non wet suit in a time of 81 hours and 28

    Minutes so this made her the 35th solo person to ever do the event and the ninth woman she was also the fourth ever person to do the swim leg of the event without a wet suit now just to remind you about what this event involves it

    Involves 140 km run from Marble Arch in London to the coast of Dover followed by a 33 km swim across the English Channel and then just a nice easy 292 km cycle from calal France to the arc the Triumph in Paris what a challenge so you can take

    Listen to Laura as she shares more about who she is how she got into sports how she developed a love for challenges and getting into Ultra races she talks more about how she trained for the event what it was like working with a coach and a nutritionist why she joined the local

    Swim Club she talks more about mental health suffering from bipolar she also talks in detail about the the challenge that she undertook having to wait for 12 hours and DOA why the swim was the biggest concern how she dealt with the tides and the currents of the English

    Channel what it was like you know seeing the arct trium for the first time and achieving her dream and celebrating she also shares more about the lessons that she’s learned from that experience it’s a it’s a hell of an episode to listen to so that episode with Laura Marshall

    November 12th 2019 so everything that we have talked about today will be available in the show notes at tgar challenges.com and I am in the process of updating the website as well so I’m adding like an inspiration tab to the website and on the inspiration tab what

    I’m hoping to do is basically underneath the inspiration tab is there’s going to be a breakdown of all of the different types of women that we’ve had on the tough girl podcast so it’s going to be pretty easy for you know if you’re interested in a particular element so

    You might be like you know what I’m training for triathlons that’s all I want to to listen to or you’re into the polls and that’s all you want to listen to or you know research or a scientist or a sailor then there will basically be all of these tabs breaking down the

    Women I hope this is making sense breaking down the women into the different tabs of what segment they may fall under so if they’re into mountaineering or running the marathon subs or climbing AC on CA then you can go to that Tab and you’ll be able to

    Find all of the episodes linked into that particular area of interest that is the idea hopefully it will come off I would really appreciate your feedback if you could visit the website and let me know what your thoughts are if it if it’s been updated by when you when you

    Listen to it that will be super super helpful any feedback that you have for me about the tough girl podcast about my website about my social media about what I’m doing I really do appreciate your feedback and you can email me sarahg challenges.com it’s very difficult when

    You work by yourself at home in your bedroom on a laptop on a mobile phone doing the type of work that I do because I never quite know if I’m hitting the mark am I asking the questions that you want to be asked am I focusing on the

    Right areas if I’m not please do let me know so you know what are the things that you think I should continue doing what are things that you w which are annoying you you know please do let me know I’m not promising that I’ll make

    The changes but it is great to have that feedback and have that input if you would like to leave a review as well for the tough girl podcast that would be a great help five star reviews on iTunes just basically when other people looking through and they’re thinking should I

    Listen to the tough girl podcast or not oh I don’t know am I going to give it a chance hopefully if they see you know enough Five Star reviews they’ll think well do you know what it has won three Awards there’s over 400 five star reviews you know what we’re going to

    Give it a listen that would be an amazing help plus also if you could tell one friend about the tough girl podcast that would mean the world to me by telling your friends about the tough girl podcast you are spreading the message you’re spreading these stories of incredible women who are out there

    Following their dreams taking on challenges and making such a big difference and I hope it is inspiring you to think about what’s your next challenge what’s the next event that you want to take on what’s the next goal that you are working towards and it doesn’t have to be a challenge that

    Claire is going after it’s never about comparisons this is about you you at home thinking right what do I want to do how am I going to challenge myself and that could be signing up for your first 5k race it could be joining a gym it

    Could be joining a run Club you know what is it that excites you that gets those butterflies in your stomach going because when you find that and you have a goal you make a plan and you start working towards it that is what it’s all about so please don’t compare yourself

    To any of the women that we have on the tough guard podcast the tough guard podcast here is to give you advice and to tips and to share these stories so that you can apply these lessons to your life at home and it is about trial and

    Error try try different things out see what works for you that is what it is all about uh thank you again for listening thank you for all your support like I mentioned at the start you can support the mission to increase the amount of female role models in the

    Media it is so simple and easy to go to do by visiting patreon p e o n.com boytg podcast and signing up as a patron you can sign up from a monthly amount whether that’s 22 a month £4 a month $5 a month $10 a month $25 a month whatever

    Level works for you there’s also an annual option as well if you don’t want to make one of if you don’t want to make monthly payments but please do go and visit patreon P n.com podcast and if you are a female patron of $5 and above then

    You are invited to join the tough girl tribe the closed Facebook group that I run where you get access to me and all of the incredible women who are patrons listeners and guests that is everything for me new episodes every Tuesday at 7:00 a.m. UK time all that’s left for me

    To say is whatever you are doing whatever no what do I normally say wherever you are whatever you are doing give it your all give it 110% get after it go for it believe in yourself because I believe believe in you take care lots of love and I’ll speak to you soon Bye

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