Sarah Millican On Road Rage & Adult Films | Control Enthusiast | Universal Comedy

Excited to announce Sarah Millican’s shows Outsider (2016) & Control Enthusiast (2018) are available to stream and download direct from Sarah’s website sarahmillican.co.uk making them available online worldwide for the first time ever.

Watch the full show here!: http://watch.sarahmillican.co.uk

Twitter: /sarahmillican75
Website: www.sarahmillican.co.uk

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I’ve been on tour since January I absolutely love being on tour I would do a lot of driving obviously when we’re on tour and I’ve discovered recently that I get a touch of Ro rage anybody else get road rage yeah I do the shouting and the swearing but my favorite thing is the

Hand gestures I love the hand gestures I do all three of them I don’t know if you know there’s three I start with that one it’s classic isn’t it and then I do that one and they can’t always say that from the other car so you do have to tilt

Your pelvis up quite High and my a [ __ ] bigger than one that ever existed the third one I do is this one and that’s when I realized that’s not one of them is it I’m so annoyed by your drive and I’m going to suck your [ __ ] for

You it’s not one of them are you guys are fun this is going to be fun I can tell already I I’ve been doing standup For 13 years I absolutely love my job when I first started doing standup it was off the back of a divorce so a lot of what I

Talked about on stage was divorce related and I did a gig in the early days in kidderminster that is so weird cuz they don’t normally cheer when you’re actually in [ __ ] kid Minster but a man came up to me after I’ve been on stage and he said I’ve got

Two things to say to you I said really what are they he said the first thing he said is [ __ ] me what you’ve been through I said I’m all right lower thanks anyway but I’m all right I said what’s the second thing he said [ __ ] me same words very different intonation

I just ran to my car as quickly as I could cuz I needed to get him home that bit’s not true I really wish it was I just ran to my car and went home on my own no was too scared I’ve never been that confident sexually not

Like that I’ve never been like [ __ ] me I’ve never been like that like that uh can’t get away with that can I I’m going have to Sure anybody can who’s in a party dress and Plum Sals but even like in the intervening years things haven’t changed I’ve been

With the same block now for 12 years and even now I’m still a bit like I mean do you fancy it should I wash it would that help app it would that’s good to [ __ ] know isn’t it well before I start properly I need to tell you or

Something if at any point you’re in the show I stand a bit funny like maybe I stick my leg out like this or lift it up like this anything where you think what the [ __ ] you doing with a leg it’s because I’ve literally just put a clean Sentry towel [Applause]

On and it hasn’t molded to me body yet I think the problem is is a little bit of wing stuck to me thigh and I am at the horniest part of my menstrual cycle so You’ being [ __ ] warned I just want somebody to hit it

With a spoon just a wooden spoon or a lad not a teaspoon cuz I’ll only [ __ ] lose that in there I feel much better I haven’t told you that thanks everybody I was talking to a friend of mine I’ve got quite low self-esteem and my friend was trying to sort of cheer me

Up and she said I think you’re a fox I said shut up I’m not a fox she said you are I think you’re a fox I said shut up I’m not a fox and then I had to think about it and I thought maybe I am a fox

In that I regularly eat out of bins some couples like to watch porn together we don’t watch porn together large because I don’t really find it does anything for me it my limited experience of heterosexual porn it seems to be very much geared towards the men

There doesn’t seem to be much there for women at all including one I watched a number of years ago that was so much from a male point of view that the camera was the man so whoever’s watching it is watching it Through The Eyes of a man very disconcerting to watch that as

A woman as a man as a woman as a man at one point the camera moved down I had an erection and [ __ ] shot myself that’s not all there was a woman going at it like it was a [ __ ] pasty oh my God to be fair that’s what I’m like with a steak

Bake just hit me in the face with it calm down that was gravy I thought maybe we could talk to the people who make the porn could we say could we have something more from a female point of view please I thought you know what we’ll get it’s not what we

Want but it’s what they think we want the camera will be the woman just be facing a [ __ ] headboard headboard headboard headboard headboard headboard we do uh we do watch a lot of uh I can’t remember what non- porn films were called there for a second

Films do watch a lot of films got the cinema quite a lot that’s probably our main hobby I suppose a few years ago we saw the film room at the cinema has anybody seen the film room yes you might have seen the film you might have read

The book I it’s even better they generally aren’t they if you haven’t seen the film though I do recommend it it’s an incredible piece of work the story is a teenage girl is abducted and held prisoner for a number of years by this kind of psychopath in his sort of

Out house type of thing it’s hard to watch she’s raped every day she falls pregnant she has to have the church has to raise the child all in this one room hence the title it’s it’s brutal it’s emotionally exhausting without to spoil it it’s also very empowering a times as

Well it’s one of those films when it it ends and the titles go up everybody in the cinema just kind of stays in their seats cuz they’re all kind of pulling themselves together we were no different my husband and I just sat in silence I’d cried so much I was just pulling myself

Together we walked to the car in silence got in the car didn’t turn the engine on sat there quietly and I was the one that broke the silence and I said to my husband I said God that was incredible what an amazing film that was so powerful so emotional I’ve cried so much

I’m absolutely knocked my husband still hadn’t spoken and I was a little bit worried because it’s not as easy for men to express emotion as it is for women so I turned to him and I said what did you think of it love and there’s a little

Pause and he went why haven’t I got a shed that’s what I’ve been bothering him for two [ __ ] hours we do watch a lot of films watched Iron Man when it was on the Telly not long ago if you don’t know it Iron Man is a superhero film it’s not really my

Cup of tea but I do quite like Robert Downey Jr in a white vest tick yeah so partway through the film I lent over to my husband and I went you should get a white vest anyone know would you like that I was like yeah I think it would he

Was like maybe I’ll get a waight Fest then and then later on the film something technical happened and they needed to fix it with tools and I lent over to my husband and I went you should get a tool belt and he went would you

Like that I was like yeah I think I would he was like maybe I’ll get a tool belt then and then I entirely forgot my train of thought and I went oh then you could do that big list of jobs I’ve got I think that’s my ideal porn film is

Just the fixing not the [ __ ] just the fixing not the [ __ ] I’d love to watch one where he fixes his washing machine and then just leave Lees cuz he’s got another job on the washing machine works for years and years and years oh you booger just the fix and not the [ __ ] and

That’s what I want do we know that’s what Jimmy savil should have stuck with as well but [Applause] anyway